Being and Nothingness

Hello lovlies! Sorry I haven't been posting and commenting in the past few days, I'm on holiday. I'll be more involved when I get home! Love you all! <3


XOXO Laura

 I feel so gross. I can't stand looking in mirrors, all I can manage to wear is sweatpants and baggy tops. I hate this, I want to escape from my own body. I don't understand how I can be so comfortable one day, eat nothing and wake up the next day still on an empty stomach, and I feel like such a fat ass! What the HECK!?!?! I'm not even tempted to eat anything, and I'm not going to, I just feel like this weight will never come off. I HATE YOU EATING DISORDER...but I also love you when i'm thin and happy. I am so screwed up.

I think i'm addicted to chewing and spitting, do you all think this is bad? I don't know if it's possibly dangerous or not...other than that, I'm about to comment on you lovely ladies' posts! Hope you're all looking after yourselves, and i'm always here to support! <3 XOXO Laura

I'm dating this new guy, and he's WONDERFUL! The only thing i'm hesitant about is that he always takes me to do things and wants to buy me food or take me to dinner. I can't eat anything he tries to buy me unless it's a fruit or veggie, and it never is. So, I'm asking you girls' opinions on wheter I should tell him about the ed or not...

XOXO Laura

I don't know if I'll ever recover. I get so sick of the constant battle inside my head. Most of the time my ed telling me not to eat anything and that i'm fat and gross. Then again once every few months I decide I really do want to get better. It's so frusterating, how do you escape from yourself?

- Love you girls!

XOXO Laura

Hey only had 300 kals today, didn't even realise i had eaten so little until i counted it up.
Had audition last week, came 4th out of 30 which is ok-ish. They didn't mention why i never got it though, not that they usually do unless they want to make a dig at my body. They try and mould you into this person who can take all that crap at dance school but in the end there isn't anyone who acctually can.
have a good day <3 xxx